Sunday, 16 June 2013

Only Virgins can wear that!!

With my fathers birthday on the 1st of June I took time to remember him and our time together. As I try to recollect moments I start to analyze them with a new more mature mind. If only I had this wisdom then, I suppose there would be many decision reversed or improved. Oh the hopelessness of regret. I will have to accept my earlier choices and look forward to bestowing my wisdom upon my children so that they are better informed.

But now time for a story: So it was time to collect our monthly maintenance money from our dad. Here they call it child support. My mom decided to come with us this time because every month we would return home with less money. She found that my father would give us all his money but would make us spend half of it on a night out. We all thought it was amusing but she had the temper of a Cape Coloured without airtime and would not stand for it.

So my father who is also never caught napping says to meet him at a local restaurant. So off we go to Mike's Kitchen which I dont believe even exists anymore. We walk into the restaurant and look for the noisiest person in the joint. There he was chatting up the waitress who he had in stiches with his usual charm and dry wit. He had the gift of the gab and loved talking. His eyes was glowing with the embers of a well intoxicated chap who was in full folly. This was my bad at his best. So we join him at the table and he immediately announces that the queen of Sheeba has arrived. Yes my mom. Iam really surprised my parents didnt get back together because they understood each other so well. They were exactly the same. Always the life of the party with the biggest voices.

Mom immediately starts messing with him and says he needs to look good for the sexy waitress. She takes out a comb and starts combing his hair straight up into a mohawk. He tried swearing and protesting but she was loving every minute of it and is unbothered. The two of them teased and insulted each other in good spirits. My brother and I just looked at each other and we knew it was gonna be a long tiring night ending with the usual blow out. After the third or so bottle of wine my mom knew the money extraction would become more tricky. So when dad stood up and left for the toilet I found my feet getting wet. My mom was pouring out his full bottle of wine he just ordered under the table. My brother was watching the wine run down the isle past our table. We did not know where to hide our faces. We have once again stepped over that huge luminous line which says in bold DO NOT CROSS. She didnt give a damn and emptied the bottle. The whole place reeked with that sweet and sour scent of a homeless person. But who cared?

Oh the drama when he came back trying to figure out why the bottle on the table was empty. After a few heated moments we finally managed to convince him its time to go. Stumbling out of the restaurant we passed a boutique and mom couldn't help teasing my dad about a sexy purple dress in the window to which he replied that "You cant wear that, its only for virgins!" That just made my night. In the end, I dont believe she got and the full amount of cash from him as he probably paid for dinner with it but the entertainment factor was well worth it.

I know they loved and complimented each other perfectly up until 10:00pm each evening after which they would try to strangle and insult each other in their usual loving way. Sad to say I miss you both. Wish I had real time to say all I wanted. Seeing a medium in January so you guys better say hi.